Can Someone's Adult Relationships Reflect What Took Place During Their Early Years?

If someone has a tendency to end up in very unsatisfactory or even abusive relationships, it may be normal for them to feel pain. Also, as a result of what happens, they can see themselves unlucky.

This area of ​​their lives will be beyond their control in one form or another, which means that there will be very little they can do about it. Given these expectations, they may have moments when they feel victimized.

External support

What one might find, if they have this look, is that there are a lot of people in their lives who validate their outlook. For example, the number of their friends can be in a similar situation.

They can then meet and talk about how sad they are and wonder when their luck will change. There will be very little they can do, because what happens is going to be what needs to be changed.

Popular culture

The view that someone is just an observer of this area of ​​his life and does not play a role is something that has been put forth in movies and TV series. Someone can end up in a bad relationship.

Since this is what the entertainment industry usually offers, it is not surprising that many people have this view. The problem with this view is that this is not exactly enabled.

Hopeless place

By having this look, you can end up feeling very jealous of people who have relationships. It may seem as if these people have what they themselves did.

If so, one can think that there is no chance at all to change this area of ​​their lives. The pain they experience in this area of ​​their lives may end up affecting all other areas of their lives.

Two levels

But even if the conscious mind thinks they are unlucky and even victimized, it does not mean that this is the truth. However, in order to discover why this area of ​​their lives is the way it is, they are likely to need to delve deeper into themselves.

The reason for this is that there is something going on in their conscious minds and there is also what happens in their unconscious minds. What happens in the latter has a much greater impact than in the past.

Self-victims

When one understands this he will realize that he is not a victim, which will allow him to see that he controls this area of ​​his life. The downside is that when one does not realize how another part of them affects their lives, it will be quite natural to feel helpless.

It seems as if something is holding them back; in fact, it will be what is happening inside them. What this confirms is how important self-knowledge is when it comes to living a satisfying life.

Completely overlooked

Perhaps the main reason why one lacks self-knowledge is that this is not something the education system touches upon. In general, the whole purpose of this system is to indoctrinate people, not to allow them to develop a better relationship with their entity.

During this time, then, the person was likely to be taken away from himself, not closer. Self-knowledge is something one must develop on his own; no one will do it for them.
priority

When it comes to the unconscious mind, this part of them just wants to experience the things associated with being familiar. To this part of them, what is familiar is what is classified as safe.

Therefore, this section does not care whether something enables or achieves, for example, only a familiar experience. With this in mind, it is not difficult to see why someone's suffering can end when he is away from this part of his being.

Two needs

So, while one can consciously wish to be with someone who treats the well, another part of them can be with someone who will not. For their unconscious mind, the part that has the greatest impact, what they can feel safe is to be around an abusive person.

Alternatively, a person may want to be with someone who is emotionally available, but with someone else who may not feel safe in their depths. Being unaware of what happens on a deeper level would be like walking in the dark; whereas when one realizes, it will be as if the light has been turned on.

Back in time

The reason to be with someone who is abusive or emotionally unavailable can be what they feel safe can be because of what happened during their formative years. This time in their lives they are likely to lay the foundations for those who will run into adults.

Fortunately, once they realize what is going on, they will be able to do something about it. So, while it may be difficult to accept that he is not just an observer of what is going on, at least he will be able to embrace his own authority.

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If they can relate to this and they want to change their lives, they may need access for outside support. This is something that can be offered with the help of a therapist or therapist.

With over 2,000 in-depth articles highlighting psychology and human behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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